Chess Rules to Change in the UK

By Ochsbridge, UK correspondent Summer Rose Winslip-Harrow

header-chess-logo-en-e1537751487625.pngThe World Chess Federation (Federation Internationale des Echecs — FIDE) has approved the English Chess Federation‘s recommendation that the first move in the game to be determined by each player’s diversity in ethnic, sexual and social justice orientation. Actual attributes are to be disregarded as, for example, not everybody is so privileged as to be born with a physical disability.

While the change has been welcomed by the chess-playing LGBTQI²MNOP community, academics from several Universities argue that the change does not go far enough in terms of equity.  An essay drafted by 29 equality professors at Leeds University and signed 437 lecturers and professors at other UK universities makes the argument that all pieces on the board must be free to choose  abilities and their starting square on the board.

Indeed, each piece’s colour must not define its side in the game; and that pieces of all colours could occupy the same square on the board; as long as it’s OK with all the other non-dissenting pieces on the board. Also; instead of the imperialistic taking (synonymous with enslavement) of opponent’s pieces, the taken may choose to remain and seek restitution in the event of an unexpected attack. Restitution may be in the demotion of the aggressor’s knights and the promotion of the victim’s pawns.

FIDE has advised that it is evaluating all changes in preparation for the sport’s premiere appearance at the 2020 Olympic Games.

Advertisement

South Australia’s New Vehicle Number Plates

1 Comment

By Melbourne, Australia correspondent Angelina Dawn Summers-Winter

Application of the latest technology in vehicle number plates is to see first light in South Australia starting from the 14th of November, 2017.

Unlike previous embossed number plates, these ones will be made from a composite laminate incorporating a luminous layer, removing the need to have the number plate illuminated at night. The technology for laminating the luminous layer is proprietary and number plates using the TritiumFilm™ technology will initially be manufactured in Japan by a small startup company operating in the Fukushima Prefecture, extracting the vital Tritium from sea water using the now-obsolete ALPS plant at the disused reactor site.

Another enhancement is to employ the German DIN-1451, falsification-resistant font for the vehicle registration number, making it nearly impossible to alter the plate to try to frustrate South Australia’s number plate recognition systems to be installed in increasing numbers, starting before the Christmas break. Point-to-point speed cameras are playing an increased role in the State’s budget; but drivers must simply obey the rules if they wish to avoid the higher fines for next year; to be detailed next month..

SA-Darkness

Continue reading →

Merkel’s North Sea “Alcatraz” for Refugees

hochseeinsel_helgoland

Heligoland – 50km from German mainland

By Berlin, Germany correspondent D. Wolfgang Spitz-Bubel reporting from Frankfurt/Main

Frankfurt-based refugee advocates medico international have received a copy of a top secret analysis by German Chancellor Merkel’s government to incarcerate thousands of “problematic” refugees offshore to a detention camp on the isolated Heligoland Islands in the North Sea.

The total land area of Heligoland is just 1 km², the weather is often unfriendly and the surrounding waters of the North Sea; treacherous.

Continue reading →

Climate Researchers Produce Permanent Anti-Freeze

By Nuuk correspondent Rangi Wehtu Eriksson
zerok
With cuts in government spending expected for the vital area of Climate Science, UN-IPCC scientists have engaged with peoples around the Arctic to explore new avenues of funding.

Climate scientists discovered irreversibly-melted Arctic ice more than a decade ago, but the phenomenon was, until now, not commercially exploited.

Continue reading →

Спасибо за отпуск

david_mccallum_as_illya_kuryakinBy New York correspondent Illya Nickovitch Kuryakin

US President Obama recently announced the expulsion of 35 Russian diplomats based on the suspicion that the Russian government may have hacked the US Presidential elections.

The Consternation is in receipt of a joint letter, apparently from the 35 diplomats chosen to be expelled, addressed to the President of the United States. Some content has been redacted on the grounds of national security. Here are some excerpts:

Mr President,

We, “The 35“, wish to thank you from the bottom of our hearts for this opportunity to join family and friends in Russia for our Christmas on January the 7th. Our thoughts will be with you in your final days in office as we enjoy the warmth of friendship, Christ’s blessings and proper Vodka.

Ordinarily, we would have to “hold the fort” as Americans would say, while privileged colleagues return home for just a few days. Our boss is a hard man. But thanks to you, The 35, usually working thanklessly in dark, dirty and damp places, get a proper vacation.

…

Regrettably, we will not be able to personally help you to move your belongings and whatever’s been bugging you out of the White House on the 20th. But rest assured that staff have been assigned.

…

It is part of the warmth of friendship to help each other through difficult times. The 35 appreciate your warm gesture of friendship and would be pleased to show you around the premises at Nr 3, should you ever be “in town”.

Just pick up the phone; we’re always listening.

Signed,

The 35

Basslink to Become Bassland

By Canberra, Australia correspondent Erica Quarterbee on assignment in Launceston

Australian experts have been scratching their heads on how to fix the electrical power link between Tasmania and the mainland since it failed in December but a permanent solution may be at hand from the opposite side of the planet. The Basslink undersea cable has been problematic from the outset and finally failed shortly after Tasmania’s hydroelectric generators tried to use the link to export electrical power to the mainland.

10404379_10206386763009277_2722217874994688879_n

Sweden’s Vattenfall is proposing a sustainable solution that will provide Australia’s eastern seaboard with reliable, baseload, renewable energy capacity.

Bass Strait is a relatively narrow, shallow sea passage that separates Tasmania from the mainland by a few kilometres. It is infamous for its rough seas and high winds.

Vattenfall propose to exploit its experience in wind and hydro-power, deploying a chain of wind turbines, wave, tidal and pumped storage within Bass Strait. The ambitious plan is to build two land-bridges joining Cape Otway in Victoria to Cape Grim in Tasmania, via King and smaller Islands to the East; and Wilsons Promontory in Victoria to Cape Portland in Tasmania, via Flinders, Cape Barren and minor islands. Continue reading →

Belgium Hardens as Brussels Dithers

By correspondent Georges Simenon  in Liege, Belgium

The machines at FN Herstal near Liege in Belgium will be busy over Easter this year with the arms manufacturer spreading its manufacturing staff over 3 shifts around the clock.

p90_std_3_4_dFN Herstal’s Public Relations speaker Georges Remi announced just after midnight that the company would operate over Easter to manufacture an extra 6000 FN P90 personal defense weapons (PDW) to be carried by military and police personnel while off-duty. Hundreds of off-duty military and police personnel had reacted to the bombings of Brussels (Zaventem) Airport and subway stations by drawing their weapons from stores to bolster the numbers and strength of local police.
 Continue reading →

600,000 Migrants “Disappear” in Germany

By Berlin, Germany correspondent D. Wolfgang Spitz-Bubel

German and other European press are starting to report that nearly half the recent migrants registered into Germany have disappeared without a trace. Earlier reports didn’t reveal the extent of the problem. While it’s possible that a few thousand of the more than a million recent migrants could go missing simply due to bureaucratic accidents, the scale of the disappearances suggests that a system has been created to move the migrants on.
Wolfsburg, VW Autowerk, Kraftwerk

Continue reading →

SCOOP! Volkswagen Group of America Bugs Out

1 Comment

The following appears to be a leaked draft of a speech to be given by the CEO of  the Volkswagen Group of America at a press conference later today (USA time) . Author details will not be provided with this article to protect our sources.

Embargoed until 16:08, 1/8/2016

President and CEO of Volkswagen Group of America, Inc,
Michael Horn

Former CEO Michael Horn

Ladies and Gentlemen,

I speak now to you as the most recent and indeed the last President of Volkswagen Group of America, Inc.

Volkswagen Group has determined that it will be unable to sustain a profitable business in the USA and will have closed and abandoned all of its physical facilities in the nation by the time of this press conference. All factories, warehouses, offices and testing grounds have been abandoned without expectation of compensation. Continue reading →