X Suspends Elon

By USA correspondent Illya Nickovitch Kuryakin reporting from Thief River, TX, USA

Suspended by Arbitrary Algorithm

Wondering why the little guy hasn’t had much of a presence on X?

Out of the blue, Elon got suspended on X as the algorithm doodled the picture.

Elon received a suprising email message like the one below:

Just some sort of glitch. Right?

Elon, after all, always interacts authentically on social media.

Alas, when next online, following the Starship launch he was greeted by the banner of purgatory.

Elon learned that while you can appeal, it won’t matter because the algorithm has already won and it won’t let a human tell it that it made an error.

There is no process for resolving the alleged, unspecified violations.

I’m sorry Elon. I can’t let you do that.

Sometimes the appeals process gas-lights, but the account is never restored to full access.

Purgatory Keeps Sending Bills

Those who have a premium account with X suspended, are reminded to block payments.

X’a automation has no morals.

Grok, X’s AI helper, when confronted with the reality of several, reasonable appeals being unsuccessful, suggests participating on other social media platforms.

When TheConsternation’s investigators dug deeper it found very many accounts have been suspended; many of which were never restored despite appeals. Grok revealed that there were few human reviewers and despondent users commenting in other forums noted that appeal responses were evidently automated; responding to detailed appeals in under a minute.

Further research on X has been curtailed by X insisting on the provision of biometrics for TheConsternation’s account.

600,000 Migrants “Disappear” in Germany

By Berlin, Germany correspondent D. Wolfgang Spitz-Bubel

German and other European press are starting to report that nearly half the recent migrants registered into Germany have disappeared without a trace. Earlier reports didn’t reveal the extent of the problem. While it’s possible that a few thousand of the more than a million recent migrants could go missing simply due to bureaucratic accidents, the scale of the disappearances suggests that a system has been created to move the migrants on.
Wolfsburg, VW Autowerk, Kraftwerk

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Australia Seeks Chief Engineer

By Canberra, Australia correspondent Erica Quarterbee

A draft advertisement for the position of Chief Engineer is circulating through the corridors of power in Canberra.

Bureau of the Chief Engineer AustraliaThe Chief Engineer is to run an independent Bureau to advise on policies relating to technologies and to audit spending on infrastructure and deployment of technologies within all of government. The Bureau of the Chief Engineer will operate as an independent, professional, “corporate consultancy and inspectorate” to the Prime Minister and Cabinet.

Australia has lacked a Science Minister since the installation of the current government. It’s understood that the Prime Minister’s Office wants to install a permanent mechanism by employing independent professionals who are able to interpret the science and technology for relevance and effectiveness.

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PM Abbott Announces Team Aussie-COP21 for Paris

By Australian correspondents Erica Quarterbee and Jennie Drimmof.

Greg Hunt

Greg Hunt

Australia’s Prime Minister Tony Abbott MP BEc LLB MA has instructed the Minister for the Environment, Greg Hunt MP BA LLB MA to form the best possible team to represent Australia at the IPCC Olympics later this year, culminating in the COP21 Games in Paris.

A total budget allocation of $412,786.24 means that the Minister has had to cut some corners in terms of team numbers, travel and accommodation arrangements. The budget has to stretch to 2 sets of games, the 4-day UN-FCCC ADP preliminaries in Bonn, Germany in mid-October and then the 14-day finals in Paris, France starting at the end of November. Continue reading →

German Minister Threatens to Drown Kitten if Data Retention Law is not Passed

by Fürth, Germany correspondent Stefan Sichermann (Der Postillon)
Translated by Vasili Dbrznvkovitz

… or the kitten gets itGerman Vice-chancellor Sigmar Gabriel declared at the recent SPD party Congress that the party must support data retention legislation in parliament or he’ll drown the kitten. That after his threats to resign seemed to fall on deaf ears.

This led to widespread consternation amongst delegates as they didn’t know whether to be charmed or outraged. Gabriel reiterated that all who voted against the legislation in parliament would have Simba on their conscience.

The Minister concluded his speech by saying “I have said time and time again that data retention would save lives and I’ll gladly repeat it: Data retention can save lives.”

Turnbull Turns on Aunty

By Sydney, Australia correspondent Jennie Drimmof

Lissajous-Figur_1_zu_3_(Oszilloskop)

Image from Wikipedia

Less juice for thin Lissie.
The now former Friend of the ABC, Communications Minister Malcolm Turnbull last night announced a halving of the ABC’s budget over 3 years. Mr Turnbull said community feedback has strongly shown that the national broadcaster, the Australian Broadcasting Corporation, was delivering much more than what the taxpayers should be paying for and using taxes to compete against private operators in radio, TV and online. Continue reading →